Saturday, October 09, 2010

Funnin’ Rachel Maddow: Rachel’s Secret Ties to Art Robinson UNVEILED!

Long before Rachel Maddow became the infamous “Madam Maddow, Sarcastic Political Analyst,” her secret connection to political neophyte Art Robinson was a carefully guarded secret. That is, until their daringly staged faux adversary interview (below) ripped apart the “Lost in Space” veil of  a shared past, our forensic journalist investigation revealed.

The secret began to unravel when an individual, identified only as “Will,” tipped us off to Rachel’s participation in a popular sci-fi reality TV series, based on a 60s cult classic, with a real family Robinson and a mysterious scientist using the common alias, “Smith,” Zachary Smith. According to Will, a precocious Rachel muscled him aside for the brain child-genius role because “I’m gonna be a Rhodes Scholar, and you’re not!”

The show was abruptly cancelled when the mysterious Professor “Smith” began peddling bizarre ideas about the healing powers of radiation with a controversial method known as Radiation-Hormesis. First, he tried to peddle jewelry stones on Rachel and the Robinsons. Rachel declined — “I don’t do bling,” she said diffidently — but Mrs. Robinson took the bait, only to freak out on-camera when she learned the stones were radioactive. Art Robinson, a.k.a Zachary Smith, was unable to quell her hysterics with arch explanations that “it excretes microtoxins” as Mrs. Robinson registered low-level radiation on a Geiger counter.

At this point Rachel decided to bolt the set. She borrowed some fare money from Art, whom she’d taken to calling her “fake uncle.” The enigmatic Art Robinson said, “Don’t worry about paying me back; when I need a favor I’ll look you up.” So when he got in touch with Rachel asking her to boost his campaign, her only question was: “You’re a Republican, right … No Tea Party or something weird like the Hormesis Party?”

ART: “I’m a Republican.”

RACHEL: “you’re in! I’m soooo excited!”

It didn’t go so well for Art Robinson. Minutes into the interview his tone turned frosty toward Rachel, calling her “Madam” and “sarcastic.” Later, Rachel explained with a shrug: “I made no representations about what questions I’d ask. You WOULDN’T BELIEVE  how many Republicans only agree to come on our show if I give them my questions in advance!”

No comments: