Sunday, July 29, 2012

Olympic Shorts: Oh, How The Mighty Have Fallen

UH-OH ... LOOKS LIKE "AMERICAN EXCEPTIONALISM" is taking a hit in the Olympic arena. My question to the racists, the xenophobes, the ethnocentrists (not the well-meaning but misguided, like Chris Matthews) is: How will you EVER live down falling to the HATED French in the 400-meter freestyle relay in one of our dominant sports, swimming, with a team that included the legendary Olympian Michael Phelps and his nemesis Ryan Lochte, swimming the anchor leg?!

How could they POSSIBLY lose?!? Huh, HUH!? To a French guy named  Yannick Agnel?! ATTENTION MSNBC resident Ayn Rand-ian (a psychotic Russian émigré, BTW), purveyor of the 'American Exceptionalism Ethos' and MOCKER of ALL THINGS FRENCH, Sarah (Eh?) Cupp: We DEMAND an explanation for this unforgivable FAIL first thing Monday on your recycled show! Well OK, you got a gold in women's skeet shooting and are certain to win one in basketball and quite a few more, no doubt. So America is still an exceptional member of the community of nations, along with a whole bunch of other nations.

Upset of The Day. — Little Honduras "upset" overrated Spain, 1-0, in Football and knocked them out of the competition. It's easy to explain, really. What would FC Barcelona be without Messi who plays for Argentina, Dani Alves who plays for Brasil, Sánchez who plays for Chile; or Real Madrid without Cristiano Ronaldo who plays for Portugal, Higuaín who plays for Argentina, Özil who plays for Germany, or Marcelo who plays for Brasil, among many others?!

Their stock would be worth about as much as their Central Bank's. For their little "system" of incessant lateral ring-around-the-rosie passing to be elevated to "best-ever" status by morons like Alexi Lalas after the Euro Cup win is a little like saying a bunch of inbred redneck okey-dokes are better at pickup hoops than the local urban league. Good on Honduras for beating an overbaked team. The final reckoning will come in Brasil in the 2014 World Cup. Spain will get its ass kicked. Count on it.

More Football FUN.— Missed Team USA knock the Colombian women out of the Olympics; I'll catch it on replay. Remember how the Colombians had vowed "revenge" against the U.S. only to be beaten by North Korea, 2-0? And now to be dealt the finishing blow by America, 3-0. Serves them right. These infantile grudge matches are like emotional suicide, considering the Colombians will have another two years at least to brood on this defeat, until their next one. Here's hoping they're not slitting their wrists at this writing for dishonoring their country. It's only a game, ladies. But a violent one at that, with 30 fouls. Abby Wambach has a swollen eye from getting sucker-punched in the face. She became Team USA's all-time Olympic goal scorer, with six. She'll need another six to equal Cristiane's all-time record. That is, if Cristiane doesn't add to her record.

In the men's game, Brazil's 3-1 romp against Belarus was a feast for the eyes. The phenom Neymar was truly phenomenal, the best man on the field. He scored a slicing foul shot over the wall into the Bel keeper's upper right corner, and gave dazzling assists on the two other goals. One was a pinpoint cross for Pato's equalizer, and the other a beautiful back heel pass to Oscar, in the box for the score. But the play of the game was an awesome run at the Belarus defense, slicing through four defenders like butter, until he tried to make one cut too many and was violently upended by a Belarus defender, who caught enough of the ball to have averted a penalty call. After dribbling the fourth guy, Neymar had a look, a brief window to take the shot. Pelé would have slotted it in.

Neymar will learn, especially after absorbing a lot of punishment. He was knocked around, stepped on, and upended. But the kid is tough and resilient. He keeps getting up. Optically, it's a relief he's gotten over the hideous mohawk look. I think the women in his life prevailed upon him. Maybe all the other copycats will now follow suit. Here's hoping. Incidentally, if you haven't seen Brazil play yet, check out number 12. His name is HULK. And he REALLY does look like HULK. I kid you not.

Finally, the UK had a nice win, 3-1, over the UAE, in venerable Wembley Stadium. It was a very entertaining game.

No comments: