Monday, October 10, 2005

The Dirty Bird

"Dirty Bird" Suspect Sought

The Department of Homeland Security announced that it has learned of a so-called "dirty bird" plot. Similar to the alleged "dirty bomb" plot involving imprisoned "enemy combatant" Jose Padilla, the "dirty bird" plot involves an individual suspected of distributing large numbers of chickens throughout the United States. The department advised that, as in the case of the "dirty bomb," there is no evidence of any actual wrongdoing or any real threat involving a "dirty bird." Homeland Security admitted, however, that with all the bird flu talk that people really don't understand and the need to distract attention away from the crummy week the White House was having, that it seemed as good a time as any to increase the terror alert level from its current "ochre" to a new level of "sea foam."

Below is a police sketch of the suspect:











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