NEWSFLASH: SANTORUM WINS IOWA! THINKER ENDORSES GINGRICH!?

OOPS ... Up by 34 votes. So instead of the mainstream/Beltway Media/Idiot Punditocracy frothing orgasmically that Romney is 2-for-2 heading for an early coronation in South Carolina, better rethink your idiot analyses, imbeciles of the Idiot Punditocracy (I'm doubling down). Here's what this really, actually means:

• Rather than being the indispensable Republican juggernaut all Republican lemmings are dutifully instructed to fall in line behind, Romney is a DEEPLY FLAWED candidate who has yet to connect with Republican voters, let alone the electorate at large. He lost in the open contest, Iowa, despite committing millions to wounding but not destroying Newt Gingrich. He won well, but not convincingly, in New Hampshire, his backyard, where he owns a home for chrissakes! People are just not that into Mittens. He's being skewered nightly by the comedian class, challenged seriously from Comedy Central by Stephen Colbert who's running his SuperPac ads in South Carolina and telling voters that a vote for Herman Cain is a vote for Colbert, which has made Romney a running joke. And once you become a late night joke, you're finished; there's no amount of Sununu/Christie salvos that can rescue Mr. 15 percent. As a result, Mittens' negatives are rising as his poll numbers drop, and Newt Gingrich has found a new purpose with his attacks, gaining on Willard with each passing hour.

• Republican South Carolina "true conservative" voters (whatever that means) have a decision to make: Split their votes between one dog pony Rick Santorum whose Iowa victory came at the expense of the withering $3 million fire Newt was taking from Romney's SuperPac, or Newt Gingrich, the most effective and realistic Stop-Romney candidate in the race.

• Newt Gingrich has earned this blog's endorsement. We love how he's riffing off our rants. For instance, he said in the debate he would not "unilaterally disarm" with respect to SuperPacs, a phrase FIRST written here with respect to Democratic fund-raising. And calling his opponent "stupid" is one of our favorite, much-used adjectives. Don't you just love all this Zeitgeist that magically makes its way from our blog to Republican candidates' mouths? But our endorsement comes in appreciation of Newt Gingrich's ruthlessness, his "subtlety of racism" which has exposed the cowardice of the fake progressive channel, and all that he's doing to advance the Progressive cause and increase Democrats' chances of victory in November. Newt says he doesn't just want to "bloody" Mittens; he wants to "knock him down." Go get 'im, Mr. Speaker!

Memo To MSNBC suits: Seriously consider bringing Chris Hayes out of the COLD, so your fleeing viewers may enjoy his superior Progressive intellect, no matter how EXTRA stupid that makes Moron Joe and copycats Halperin-Heilemann look. Chris is so much smarter than his colleagues that he runs absolutely no risk of being CNN-ized and Capusized into 'how fascinating is your WINGNUT perspective', as Alex Wagner has become. Why else would Rachel's "I'm so jealous, it's the best-political-show-in-the-world!" come to us at the ungodly 6 a.m. Central time hour, hmm? Not that they would listen to Rachel anyway, except when endorsing (recommending?) Michael Steele's disastrous beginning-of-the-end for progressive programming hire.