Saturday, December 13, 2008
Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry
So, the Senate Republicans, led by the repulsive Mitch McConnell, who every night snuggles up to his equally repulsive spouse, the most anti-labor Secretary of Labor in U.S. history, are hell-bent on torpedoing the American automobile industry.
They are trying to practice disaster capitalism at its worst, by destroying the economy and the nation to rebuild it in their perverted image. How any decent person can support these "Republicans," I have no idea. And I am not talking about being "conservative" or adhering to a small government fiscal restraint approach to governing. Make no mistake, these idealogues you see in action are RADICALS, bent on a profound, permanent and tragic restructuring of American society. The object is the consolidation of wealth and the elimination of the middle class.
Do they care if jobs that allow people to live in a decent house, send their kids to college and spend a week at the beach disappear into either thin air or some East Asian sweatshop? Of course not. THAT IS THEIR OBJECTIVE. The right-wing bloviators on talk radio whine about "class warfare," but they are the ones that are practicing it. Damn right we're at war, and right now we're getting destroyed.
I'm toying around with something in my delusional mind. The rich of Chicago PAID to have Fort Sheridan built here on the north shore to have a military garrison around them after the Haymarket incident (the only military installation EVER paid for with private funds.) Just wondering, how much of our bloated defense budget, besides making the staggeringly rich staggeringly richer, goes to protecting the government not from enemies but from us? To eliminate forever Jefferson's right of the people to alter or abolish the form of government instituted among them?
They are trying to practice disaster capitalism at its worst, by destroying the economy and the nation to rebuild it in their perverted image. How any decent person can support these "Republicans," I have no idea. And I am not talking about being "conservative" or adhering to a small government fiscal restraint approach to governing. Make no mistake, these idealogues you see in action are RADICALS, bent on a profound, permanent and tragic restructuring of American society. The object is the consolidation of wealth and the elimination of the middle class.
Do they care if jobs that allow people to live in a decent house, send their kids to college and spend a week at the beach disappear into either thin air or some East Asian sweatshop? Of course not. THAT IS THEIR OBJECTIVE. The right-wing bloviators on talk radio whine about "class warfare," but they are the ones that are practicing it. Damn right we're at war, and right now we're getting destroyed.
I'm toying around with something in my delusional mind. The rich of Chicago PAID to have Fort Sheridan built here on the north shore to have a military garrison around them after the Haymarket incident (the only military installation EVER paid for with private funds.) Just wondering, how much of our bloated defense budget, besides making the staggeringly rich staggeringly richer, goes to protecting the government not from enemies but from us? To eliminate forever Jefferson's right of the people to alter or abolish the form of government instituted among them?
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
We're ****ed and a long way from home...
RR, Doc you've seen this but...we are screwed royally by this mess.
A "special election," while desirable, is also problematic. First you have to get the state legislature to pass something (and have it survive constitutional challenges, changing the rules during the game). Then of course THE GOVERNOR has to sign it. He can sit on it for sixty days before vetoing it, and then it goes back to the legislature for an override vote. From there the mechanisms have to gear up, nominating petitions, primaries, etc. We're going to the beach in Michigan before any voting happens.
And the Illinois attorney general is talking up a challenge via the state supreme court. The state supremes would be a real stretch. The court under Rule 382 can consider a motion on "the ability of the Governor to serve or resume office" but that seems pretty clearly aimed at physical/mental incapacitation, not mere soullessness.
A "special election," while desirable, is also problematic. First you have to get the state legislature to pass something (and have it survive constitutional challenges, changing the rules during the game). Then of course THE GOVERNOR has to sign it. He can sit on it for sixty days before vetoing it, and then it goes back to the legislature for an override vote. From there the mechanisms have to gear up, nominating petitions, primaries, etc. We're going to the beach in Michigan before any voting happens.
And the Illinois attorney general is talking up a challenge via the state supreme court. The state supremes would be a real stretch. The court under Rule 382 can consider a motion on "the ability of the Governor to serve or resume office" but that seems pretty clearly aimed at physical/mental incapacitation, not mere soullessness.
More Blag-ing
None of us were shocked or surprised by the indictment of the governor. We've known he was dirty for a LONG time. We knew this day would come, but at least I anticipated it would be for something much more pedestrian. The usual "contribution" for a pension board appointment, an envelope for a highway contract, a job for someone's nephew, etc.
Even this jaded observer, though, was surprised that the governor was this stupid and greedy with such a high-profile matter, WHILE UNDER INVESTIGATION by the modern Elliott Ness. Stupid is as stupid does, I guess.
BUT--we could be screwed by this nonsense. Gov. Hair won't resign, and he cannot make a credible Senate appointment. Any legislative change in the process has a long startup time to clear. At a time when every vote counts, that seat could sit empty for months.
Even this jaded observer, though, was surprised that the governor was this stupid and greedy with such a high-profile matter, WHILE UNDER INVESTIGATION by the modern Elliott Ness. Stupid is as stupid does, I guess.
BUT--we could be screwed by this nonsense. Gov. Hair won't resign, and he cannot make a credible Senate appointment. Any legislative change in the process has a long startup time to clear. At a time when every vote counts, that seat could sit empty for months.
Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Poo-flinging howler monkeys
Well said, Driftglass:
Understand that, in Illinois, Democrats now control the state House, state Senate, every state-wide constitutional office, the Mayoralty of Chicago, the city council of Chicago, the board controlling the second most populous county in the country (Cook), and almost the entire federal congressional delegation at a time when the DNC has been moved to Chicago, and an Illinois Senator is about to be sworn in as President.
So you'd think, hey, maybe now would not be the very best time to piss away a once-in-a-lifetime historic opportunity to consolidate Democratic gains by fucking up the state budget and generally carrying on like poo-flinging howler monkeys.
But you would be wrong.
Like our national politics (explicated brilliantly here by Glenn Greenwald), Illinois politics is freighted with dynasties full of talentless scions with monstrous egos and an overweening sense of entitlement, and so in the midst of an historic Democratic sea-change, Rod, Son of Mell and Todd (Stroger, current corrupt and inept President of the grotesquely bloated Cook County Board), Son of John (former corrupt and inept President of the grotesquely bloated Cook County Board, about which more some other day) have managed to induce such revulsion in the polity that even loyal, lifelong Dems are openly pining for the days when Republican Governor George Ryan could at least get shit done, and Republican Governor Jim Edgar bestrode the prairie like a bipartisan Colossus.
Understand that, in Illinois, Democrats now control the state House, state Senate, every state-wide constitutional office, the Mayoralty of Chicago, the city council of Chicago, the board controlling the second most populous county in the country (Cook), and almost the entire federal congressional delegation at a time when the DNC has been moved to Chicago, and an Illinois Senator is about to be sworn in as President.
So you'd think, hey, maybe now would not be the very best time to piss away a once-in-a-lifetime historic opportunity to consolidate Democratic gains by fucking up the state budget and generally carrying on like poo-flinging howler monkeys.
But you would be wrong.
Like our national politics (explicated brilliantly here by Glenn Greenwald), Illinois politics is freighted with dynasties full of talentless scions with monstrous egos and an overweening sense of entitlement, and so in the midst of an historic Democratic sea-change, Rod, Son of Mell and Todd (Stroger, current corrupt and inept President of the grotesquely bloated Cook County Board), Son of John (former corrupt and inept President of the grotesquely bloated Cook County Board, about which more some other day) have managed to induce such revulsion in the polity that even loyal, lifelong Dems are openly pining for the days when Republican Governor George Ryan could at least get shit done, and Republican Governor Jim Edgar bestrode the prairie like a bipartisan Colossus.
New Listing
Thoughts on the Blago Indictment
First off, I am ever-so-glad that retired GOP senator Peter Fitzgerald pushed to have Patrick Fitzgerald (no relation) appointed as US Attorney for the northern district of Illinois. Both Dennis Hastert and George Ryan fought against the appointment, as the US Attorney had a reputation for being independent, tenacious, and - most important - utterly beyond reproach. This man has gone after everyone of every possible politial stripe, without any thought as to that person's public position.
Second, Pat Quinn (sitting Lt. Governor) may be a pain in the ass, but he is also regarded as squeaky-clean. He just stated in a press conference that in his opinion, there is no way that Blago should appoint anyone to fill the senate vacancy. He called for Blago to voluntarily "step aside." He further stated that if Blago refuses to step aside, the IL Supreme Court can make a determination that Blago is too compromised to continue in his duties.
Third, Blago is either the most arrogant or the most idiotic politician since Nixon...
Fourth, if I was " Senate Hopeful 5" I'd be looking for a really good lawyer.
Fifth, if the indictment is true, Obama comes out of this looking even BETTER, as he refused to do anything more than be "appreciative" if Blago named his favored candidate (Valerie Jarrett).
Second, Pat Quinn (sitting Lt. Governor) may be a pain in the ass, but he is also regarded as squeaky-clean. He just stated in a press conference that in his opinion, there is no way that Blago should appoint anyone to fill the senate vacancy. He called for Blago to voluntarily "step aside." He further stated that if Blago refuses to step aside, the IL Supreme Court can make a determination that Blago is too compromised to continue in his duties.
Third, Blago is either the most arrogant or the most idiotic politician since Nixon...
Fourth, if I was " Senate Hopeful 5" I'd be looking for a really good lawyer.
Fifth, if the indictment is true, Obama comes out of this looking even BETTER, as he refused to do anything more than be "appreciative" if Blago named his favored candidate (Valerie Jarrett).
More on Blagy
He did it all...
CHICAGO – Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich was arrested Tuesday on charges of conspiring to get financial benefits through his authority to appoint a U.S. senator to fill the vacancy left by Barack Obama's election as president.
According to a federal criminal complaint, Blagojevich also was charged with illegally threatening to withhold state assistance to Tribune Co., the owner of the Chicago Tribune, in the sale of Wrigley Field. In return for state assistance, Blagojevich allegedly wanted members of the paper's editorial board who had been critical of him fired.
Blagojevich also was charged with using his authority as governor in an attempt to squeeze out campaign contributions, prosecutors said.
CHICAGO – Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich was arrested Tuesday on charges of conspiring to get financial benefits through his authority to appoint a U.S. senator to fill the vacancy left by Barack Obama's election as president.
According to a federal criminal complaint, Blagojevich also was charged with illegally threatening to withhold state assistance to Tribune Co., the owner of the Chicago Tribune, in the sale of Wrigley Field. In return for state assistance, Blagojevich allegedly wanted members of the paper's editorial board who had been critical of him fired.
Blagojevich also was charged with using his authority as governor in an attempt to squeeze out campaign contributions, prosecutors said.
Has any state ever had two govs in prison at the same time?
Source: Feds take Gov. Blagojevich into custody
A source said today that Gov. Rod Blagojevich was taken into federal custody at his North Side home this morning. The U.S. attorney's office would not confirm the information. A Blagojevich spokesman said he was unaware of the development. "Haven't heard anything -- you are first to call," Lucio Guerrero said in an e-mail.
The stunning, early morning visit by authorities to the governor's North Side home came amid revelations that federal investigators had recorded the governor with the cooperation of a longtime confidant and had begun to focus on the possibility that the process of choosing a Senate successor to President-elect Barack Obama could be tainted by pay-to-play politics.
More
What a disgrace. Stupidity should be severely punished.
My ONE rule for an auto bailout
I support action to keep the industry alive. We need to make SOMETHING here, after all.
But any company that accepts ANY federal money has to do one thing:
TELL ME HOW MUCH THE DAMN CAR COSTS.
No more haggling, no more "talking to the manager," no more "what can I do to put you in this car today," no more undercoating, etc. No more walking out feeling like I've been had. Put a price tag on it. If I want it, I'll buy it.
Otherwise--no soup for you.
But any company that accepts ANY federal money has to do one thing:
TELL ME HOW MUCH THE DAMN CAR COSTS.
No more haggling, no more "talking to the manager," no more "what can I do to put you in this car today," no more undercoating, etc. No more walking out feeling like I've been had. Put a price tag on it. If I want it, I'll buy it.
Otherwise--no soup for you.
Sunday, December 07, 2008
George W. Bush: A Legacy of Lies
Howard Fineman of Newsweek and others have noted that introspection was never a Bush family characteristic. In W's case, I would add a lack of curiosity and a less than average intelligence. The NeoCon blank slate, noted by Peter, instilled in Bush an aversion for government, except as a means to impose absolute power by force of arms, bullying of friend and foe alike, and lining the pockets of powerful special interest friends. As Bush joked to an audience of fat cats, "you're my base."
The results are in and they're catastrophic. In the end, whether or not there was venality is irrelevant -- denial, as they say, ain't just a river in Egypt. The abuse of power, the shredding of the Constitution, the politicization of the Justice Department, the doctoring of intelligence to justify preemptive war, all or any of these are impeachable offenses. That they were never seriously considered during the past five years is not only the failure of a Congress too cowed to take on a president in times of war, Orwellian perpetual war, but also of large sectors of the media that sold out to profits over serious journalism. And ultimately too, of the people who twice elected this … whatever.
What we are seeing in these exit interviews is an astonishing and pathetic attempt to rewrite history, in search of a legacy. Isn't it ironic that the individual tapped to spin the Bush years is none other than Karl Rove? It seems oddly appropriate in a way that the revisionism of the Bush years should be assigned to Bush's chief propagandist, heading the so-called "Bush legacy project."
But it won't work. Karl Rove can't spin, scrub, and sanitize eight years of lies, incompetence, venality, and criminality. As Rachel Maddow said, there are certain inconvenient things called, in Bushspeak, "the internets and the google." Despite this administration's unprecedented secrecy -- its elevation of the national security state pushing the limits of government beyond even what Nixon attempted with "executive privilege," bizarre concepts such the "unitary executive," a pseudo-legal justification for giving the president dictatorial powers, and unrestrained abuse of the Patriot Act to spy on American citizens -- there is in all of this a substantial record to be examined. Records can be spun and interpreted, but they cannot be lied about.
George W. Bush exits (just GO, leave already!) as the worst ever president in American history. That’s my personal assessment, but I honestly doubt a consensus of historians would disagree. True to form, W and loyal sidekick Rove exit much as they entered: lying.
The results are in and they're catastrophic. In the end, whether or not there was venality is irrelevant -- denial, as they say, ain't just a river in Egypt. The abuse of power, the shredding of the Constitution, the politicization of the Justice Department, the doctoring of intelligence to justify preemptive war, all or any of these are impeachable offenses. That they were never seriously considered during the past five years is not only the failure of a Congress too cowed to take on a president in times of war, Orwellian perpetual war, but also of large sectors of the media that sold out to profits over serious journalism. And ultimately too, of the people who twice elected this … whatever.
What we are seeing in these exit interviews is an astonishing and pathetic attempt to rewrite history, in search of a legacy. Isn't it ironic that the individual tapped to spin the Bush years is none other than Karl Rove? It seems oddly appropriate in a way that the revisionism of the Bush years should be assigned to Bush's chief propagandist, heading the so-called "Bush legacy project."
But it won't work. Karl Rove can't spin, scrub, and sanitize eight years of lies, incompetence, venality, and criminality. As Rachel Maddow said, there are certain inconvenient things called, in Bushspeak, "the internets and the google." Despite this administration's unprecedented secrecy -- its elevation of the national security state pushing the limits of government beyond even what Nixon attempted with "executive privilege," bizarre concepts such the "unitary executive," a pseudo-legal justification for giving the president dictatorial powers, and unrestrained abuse of the Patriot Act to spy on American citizens -- there is in all of this a substantial record to be examined. Records can be spun and interpreted, but they cannot be lied about.
George W. Bush exits (just GO, leave already!) as the worst ever president in American history. That’s my personal assessment, but I honestly doubt a consensus of historians would disagree. True to form, W and loyal sidekick Rove exit much as they entered: lying.
Friday, December 05, 2008
Farewell, #31
It is with some sadness that the Thinker waves goodbye to the best pitcher I've ever seen, twice-former Cub Greg Maddux, who is announcing his retirement after 21 years in major league baseball. There are two of us on this blog who, when chatting sports, use "Maddux" as part of our moniker, and I know I'm not the only one here who will miss watching him pitch. Even during his exile in Atlanta (okay, he piled up some rather extraordinary numbers in exile), my dad and I used to sit down and watch him every fifth day, because his outings were unlike any others. When he was at his best, hitters just were overmatched, not by staggering physical talent, but because he was so good at so many things that his arsenal of pitches just went beyond anything they could cope with.
Five years from now, his name will come up for a vote for the MLB Hall of Fame. He'll get in, on the first ballot, and by a large margin. Of course, he won't be unanimous, because no one ever is. The BBWAA is comprised, sadly, of too many morons of the sort who cannot abide greatness and must always find fault. They can go screw themselves.
Someday, if the Cubs are smart, they'll bring Maddux and Fergie Jenkins back and finally retire #31. Maddux won't seek the spotlight, but it is his.
Five years from now, his name will come up for a vote for the MLB Hall of Fame. He'll get in, on the first ballot, and by a large margin. Of course, he won't be unanimous, because no one ever is. The BBWAA is comprised, sadly, of too many morons of the sort who cannot abide greatness and must always find fault. They can go screw themselves.
Someday, if the Cubs are smart, they'll bring Maddux and Fergie Jenkins back and finally retire #31. Maddux won't seek the spotlight, but it is his.
Thursday, December 04, 2008
Bush 2.0
So our most grotesquely failed president has decided to re-invent himself. In an interview with Charlie Gibson, and in a self-serving blatherfest with his sister, he gave us these gems:
"I think I was unprepared for war..."
Really? That's surprising, given that you talked about invading Iraq as GOVERNOR OF TEXAS in 1999? Given that the cronies that made up this war out of whole cloth published their stupidity in 1998 ? (see the Project for the New American Century)
"The biggest regret of all the presidency has to have been the intelligence failure in Iraq...a lot of leaders of nations around the world were all looking at the same intelligence."
Hmm, you mean the "intelligence" that your administration manufactured and misrepresented? That several countries told you was bullshit? You mean that "intelligence?"
"You know, I'm the president during this period of time, but I think when the history of this period is written, people will realize a lot of the decisions that were made on Wall Street took place over a decade or so, before I arrived in president"
You know, the Clinton years, our long national nightmare of peace and prosperity...The buck stops over there somewhere.
"And when people review the history of this administration, people will say that this administration tried hard to get a regulator."
WHAT??? YOU, wanted regulation? And now I suppose the pope now officiates at gay abortionist weddings????
"I'd like to be a president [known] as somebody who liberated 50 million people and helped achieve peace"--
You "liberated" people into death and chaos, and brought about a hellish cataclysm. And peace? We'll be waiting on that one for a while.
The grand question is...
Is this man the boy in the bubble? Does he really BELIEVE any of this nonsense?
Back in 1998, when the neocon cabal recruited him, he was "tutored" in foreign policy by the PNAC crowd, they considered him to be a blank slate. Bob Woodward paints him as a simple man, a Chance the Gardener character, who sees his little ugly war as the story of how many of "them" we killed.
Venal or clueless? Both, probably. The act may have worked in Austin but it will be remembered as one of our greatest national tragedies.
"I think I was unprepared for war..."
Really? That's surprising, given that you talked about invading Iraq as GOVERNOR OF TEXAS in 1999? Given that the cronies that made up this war out of whole cloth published their stupidity in 1998 ? (see the Project for the New American Century)
"The biggest regret of all the presidency has to have been the intelligence failure in Iraq...a lot of leaders of nations around the world were all looking at the same intelligence."
Hmm, you mean the "intelligence" that your administration manufactured and misrepresented? That several countries told you was bullshit? You mean that "intelligence?"
"You know, I'm the president during this period of time, but I think when the history of this period is written, people will realize a lot of the decisions that were made on Wall Street took place over a decade or so, before I arrived in president"
You know, the Clinton years, our long national nightmare of peace and prosperity...The buck stops over there somewhere.
"And when people review the history of this administration, people will say that this administration tried hard to get a regulator."
WHAT??? YOU, wanted regulation? And now I suppose the pope now officiates at gay abortionist weddings????
"I'd like to be a president [known] as somebody who liberated 50 million people and helped achieve peace"--
You "liberated" people into death and chaos, and brought about a hellish cataclysm. And peace? We'll be waiting on that one for a while.
The grand question is...
Is this man the boy in the bubble? Does he really BELIEVE any of this nonsense?
Back in 1998, when the neocon cabal recruited him, he was "tutored" in foreign policy by the PNAC crowd, they considered him to be a blank slate. Bob Woodward paints him as a simple man, a Chance the Gardener character, who sees his little ugly war as the story of how many of "them" we killed.
Venal or clueless? Both, probably. The act may have worked in Austin but it will be remembered as one of our greatest national tragedies.
Wednesday, December 03, 2008
Followup
It's a week later, and we're still embroiled in the saga of plumbing, although progress has indeed been made. The pipe hasn't leaked since the plumbers put the clamp on it, but they'll be coming back tomorrow to replace a sizable portion of the plumbing in our house with stuff that's not 74 year old galvanized steel. To make it easier for them (and so that we didn't have to pay two plumbers to do the work), I spent yesterday at home tearing out a 9' x 8' chunk (both drywall and plaster) of our living room ceiling. Of course, what made it a challenge was that we have checked and confirmed that, yes, some of the older paint in the house is lead-based, so we had to take a lot of precautions to try to prevent the spread of dust. It's quite bad for babymagoo, and since he's still partially on breast milk, that means mrsdrmagoo can't be involved in any of the work, either. So I put up a bunch of plastic around the area, wore masks (I couldn't find the right kind of mask, so hopefully two of almost the right kind of mask will be good enough), and then washed the whole area down with Trisodium Phosphate, which is what we were told to use to clean up the dust. That...was fun.
As a side note, has anyone else ever noticed the slots in old medicine cabinets for used razor blades? The blades go somewhere, of course, which is into the walls of the house. Until renovation is started, in which case they fall on your head.
Tomorrow, the plumbers will be back, and when I get home from work at 6:30 or so, I'll clean up any mess they make (in case they need to make access holes to the downstairs bath) and then let Beth know it's safe to bring the boy back home. Then, we will try to find a drywall contractor to come in and replace the drywall and make the seams as clean as possible. Whee!
On the plus side, the trip out to WV went well. My family is doing pretty well (actually, the economy hasn't hurt us that much....yet), and everyone loves spending time with babymagoo. On the way back, we stopped for a tour of the Woodford Reserve distillery. That was pretty cool, and it's in a gorgeous part of Kentucky, right outside of Lexington (the whole area just screams Kentucky, with rolling hills and horse farms). The beverage they produce is pretty dang good, too.
This weekend, we'll be up in the city for our annual pilgrimage to the Christkindlmarkt for German food and freezing.
As a side note, has anyone else ever noticed the slots in old medicine cabinets for used razor blades? The blades go somewhere, of course, which is into the walls of the house. Until renovation is started, in which case they fall on your head.
Tomorrow, the plumbers will be back, and when I get home from work at 6:30 or so, I'll clean up any mess they make (in case they need to make access holes to the downstairs bath) and then let Beth know it's safe to bring the boy back home. Then, we will try to find a drywall contractor to come in and replace the drywall and make the seams as clean as possible. Whee!
On the plus side, the trip out to WV went well. My family is doing pretty well (actually, the economy hasn't hurt us that much....yet), and everyone loves spending time with babymagoo. On the way back, we stopped for a tour of the Woodford Reserve distillery. That was pretty cool, and it's in a gorgeous part of Kentucky, right outside of Lexington (the whole area just screams Kentucky, with rolling hills and horse farms). The beverage they produce is pretty dang good, too.
This weekend, we'll be up in the city for our annual pilgrimage to the Christkindlmarkt for German food and freezing.
I find this guy humorous....
China Buys Naming Rights to U.S.
Nation to be renamed 'Panda Garden'
by Andy Borowitz
In a landmark deal that could provide much-needed cash to America's anemic economy, China agreed today to acquire the naming rights to the U.S. for a reported $1.4 trillion.
The deal, which is expected to be signed by President George W. Bush and Chinese President Hu Jintao sometime before Inauguration Day on January 20, was hailed today by Mr. Bush as a "win-win" for both countries.
"We get 1.4 trillion dollars, and all we have to do is change our name to ‘Panda Garden,'" Mr. Bush told reporters at the White House.
The president said he decided to make the extraordinary deal after being shocked to learn that the U.S. was in a recession, when it was reported yesterday in Duh magazine.
According to President Hu, the Chinese had originally inquired about purchasing the rights to two American sports facilities named after troubled companies, Ford Field in Detroit and Citi Field in New York, but then decided it might be more cost-efficient to buy the rights "to the whole shebang."
In addition to the $1.4 trillion, the Chinese government said that it would provide $10 million to commission a new national anthem that would somehow incorporate the words "Panda Garden" in the lyrics, and to redesign the nation's flag, which will henceforth be known as "the stars, stripes, and adorable bear."
Has China effectively become our banker?
Nation to be renamed 'Panda Garden'
by Andy Borowitz
In a landmark deal that could provide much-needed cash to America's anemic economy, China agreed today to acquire the naming rights to the U.S. for a reported $1.4 trillion.
The deal, which is expected to be signed by President George W. Bush and Chinese President Hu Jintao sometime before Inauguration Day on January 20, was hailed today by Mr. Bush as a "win-win" for both countries.
"We get 1.4 trillion dollars, and all we have to do is change our name to ‘Panda Garden,'" Mr. Bush told reporters at the White House.
The president said he decided to make the extraordinary deal after being shocked to learn that the U.S. was in a recession, when it was reported yesterday in Duh magazine.
According to President Hu, the Chinese had originally inquired about purchasing the rights to two American sports facilities named after troubled companies, Ford Field in Detroit and Citi Field in New York, but then decided it might be more cost-efficient to buy the rights "to the whole shebang."
In addition to the $1.4 trillion, the Chinese government said that it would provide $10 million to commission a new national anthem that would somehow incorporate the words "Panda Garden" in the lyrics, and to redesign the nation's flag, which will henceforth be known as "the stars, stripes, and adorable bear."
Has China effectively become our banker?
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
Singh'in the the Rain
Be thankful that there is not (yet) a "Singh Doctrine," with the Indian prime minister claiming the right of preemptive war against any enemy, no matter how hypothetical. India and Pakistan came close to nuclear blows earlier this decade. Let us hope cooler heads prevail.
Reality, what a concept!
The president-elect becomes more impressive every day.
He rolled out a heavyweight national security team, largely centrist in nature, and mentioned two concepts in dealing with international security that had been confined to the dustbin of the Bush disaster--DIPLOMACY and LAW ENFORCEMENT.
So far, so good, Mr. Obama.
He rolled out a heavyweight national security team, largely centrist in nature, and mentioned two concepts in dealing with international security that had been confined to the dustbin of the Bush disaster--DIPLOMACY and LAW ENFORCEMENT.
So far, so good, Mr. Obama.
Monday, December 01, 2008
Don't know much about history
Read 'em and weep. These Illinois historic sites are now closed because of our state government's ineptness. In addition, many other state sites have seen reductions in staff and opening days/hours. A short-sighted waste of our cultural heritage.
Dana-Thomas House, Springfield (Frank Lloyd Wright masterpiece pictured below)
Dana-Thomas House, Springfield (Frank Lloyd Wright masterpiece pictured below)
Lincoln log cabin
Fort de Chartres
Vandalia statehouse
State center at Bishop Hill
Carl Sandburg birthplace
Cahokia courthouse
Hauberg Indian Museum
Jubilee College
Apple River Fort
Fort Kaskaskia
Pierre Menard home
Gone. Lost. Wasted.
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