Thursday, July 21, 2005
Back in a week!
Off for a week of R&R to the tropical sands of...northern Ohio! (click on title header of the post to see our cute little destination). My able teammates will carry on in my stead!
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
Lying under oath?
''I, George Walker Bush, do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my Ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.''
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
The Hippie, Round 2
This award goes to the hypocrite of the week.
The nominees:
RNC Chairman Ken Mehlman, with this Tilt-a-Whirl of spin:
"Two stories have come out this week, both of which have the effect of exonerating and vindicating Mr. Rove, not implicating him. And what's so amazing and what's so outrageous, in my judgment, is, despite the fact that this investigation is ongoing, despite the fact that Mr. Rove and other people at the White House are cooperating fully with Pat Fitzgerald, Democrat partisans on the Hill have engaged in a smear campaign where they have attacked Karl Rove on the basis of information which actually vindicates and exonerates him, not implicates him."
Please, that doesn't even pass the giggle test.
Victoria Toensing, described in the Washington Post as "a lawyer and longtime Republican (wow, two strikes right there!) who helped write the Intelligence Identities Protection Act of 1982." She amazingly says, in regard to President Chimpy's comments below,
"Of course you are going to be concerned if a law was broken, but what is it that somebody did wrong if they didn't break the law?"
WHAT??? This from the party that wants to control who we sleep with, what we watch, what kids wear, who we marry and what we listen to says its OK if its not a crime? Pornography? Drunkenness? Profanity? Flag burning? Racism? Atheism? Lying? Adultery? Abortion, perhaps? I suppose since it's legal, it's OK? Amazing.
President Chimpy, who despite already receiving the Lifetime Achievement Award, has to be nominated for changing his tune from firing anyone INVOLVED to anyone who committed a crime (i.e., charged, indicted, tried and convicted). Pathetic.
Upon reflection, it is a dead heat. A Hippy goes to both Ken and Vicky, and we have to add another sticker to Chimpy's trophy....
The nominees:
RNC Chairman Ken Mehlman, with this Tilt-a-Whirl of spin:
"Two stories have come out this week, both of which have the effect of exonerating and vindicating Mr. Rove, not implicating him. And what's so amazing and what's so outrageous, in my judgment, is, despite the fact that this investigation is ongoing, despite the fact that Mr. Rove and other people at the White House are cooperating fully with Pat Fitzgerald, Democrat partisans on the Hill have engaged in a smear campaign where they have attacked Karl Rove on the basis of information which actually vindicates and exonerates him, not implicates him."
Please, that doesn't even pass the giggle test.
Victoria Toensing, described in the Washington Post as "a lawyer and longtime Republican (wow, two strikes right there!) who helped write the Intelligence Identities Protection Act of 1982." She amazingly says, in regard to President Chimpy's comments below,
"Of course you are going to be concerned if a law was broken, but what is it that somebody did wrong if they didn't break the law?"
WHAT??? This from the party that wants to control who we sleep with, what we watch, what kids wear, who we marry and what we listen to says its OK if its not a crime? Pornography? Drunkenness? Profanity? Flag burning? Racism? Atheism? Lying? Adultery? Abortion, perhaps? I suppose since it's legal, it's OK? Amazing.
President Chimpy, who despite already receiving the Lifetime Achievement Award, has to be nominated for changing his tune from firing anyone INVOLVED to anyone who committed a crime (i.e., charged, indicted, tried and convicted). Pathetic.
Upon reflection, it is a dead heat. A Hippy goes to both Ken and Vicky, and we have to add another sticker to Chimpy's trophy....
The coverup is always worse than the crime....
Raise your hand if you think Mr. Fitzgerald has some perjury and obstruction charges ready to go?
If I was the president....
Well, for one thing, I wouldn't be a lying, amoral cretin who deceived the country into war, but that is another story for another time.
I would, however, be quite nervous right about now. Patrick Fitzgerald, the U.S. Attorney for the Northern District of Illinois, is FEARLESS. He is getting VERY close to Hizzoner Da Mare's office here in Chicago on a variety of scandals. If he isn't afraid of Daley, the machine and the mob, he certainly won't be cowed by greedy oilmen. Karl Rove may well be just some low-hanging fruit....stay tuned!
I would, however, be quite nervous right about now. Patrick Fitzgerald, the U.S. Attorney for the Northern District of Illinois, is FEARLESS. He is getting VERY close to Hizzoner Da Mare's office here in Chicago on a variety of scandals. If he isn't afraid of Daley, the machine and the mob, he certainly won't be cowed by greedy oilmen. Karl Rove may well be just some low-hanging fruit....stay tuned!
Monday, July 18, 2005
Who are these people????
20 percent of respondents to the recent WSJ-NBC poll described President Chimpy as "smart" and "intelligent."
Two questions...
1) who are these people and 2) how can I get them to play poker with me?
Two questions...
1) who are these people and 2) how can I get them to play poker with me?
Friday, July 15, 2005
You say tomato, I say tomahto, let's call the whole thing..PRISON!
Detainees.
It doesn't sound bad, does it? Detained. "Excuse me sir, it will be just a minute, please have a seat." A trifle, a minor inconvenience. You tell your friends when you're late, "sorry, I was detained." A slight delay, a little problem, something came up---THAT is "detained."
"Excuse me, sir, I'm going to transport you to a military camp thousands of miles from home with no formal charges for an unspecified period of time without notice to your family and play `hide the cattle prod' with you."
THAT is PRISON.
But yet read any U.S. news source and you won't find "prisoner" mentioned. Prisoners--bad. Detainees? Why, it almost sounds pleasant ...(and let's not forget the orange-glazed chicken, yummy!).
Why doesn't our "free" and "liberal" press have the nerve to even use the right words?
More on that later.
Peace.
It doesn't sound bad, does it? Detained. "Excuse me sir, it will be just a minute, please have a seat." A trifle, a minor inconvenience. You tell your friends when you're late, "sorry, I was detained." A slight delay, a little problem, something came up---THAT is "detained."
"Excuse me, sir, I'm going to transport you to a military camp thousands of miles from home with no formal charges for an unspecified period of time without notice to your family and play `hide the cattle prod' with you."
THAT is PRISON.
But yet read any U.S. news source and you won't find "prisoner" mentioned. Prisoners--bad. Detainees? Why, it almost sounds pleasant ...(and let's not forget the orange-glazed chicken, yummy!).
Why doesn't our "free" and "liberal" press have the nerve to even use the right words?
More on that later.
Peace.
Wednesday, July 13, 2005
The Employee Discount
All the car makers are extending this "employee discount" to everyone, in the sales pitches. Sorry, but doesn't this just screw the employees? So assume I work for GM for 37 years and my neighbor gets the same deal as I do??? Thanks for the "discount," boss!
Monday, July 11, 2005
Insults? Outrage?
CNN reports that Republicans are angry about Hillary Clinton "insulting" the president. Let's see:
Democratic insult: "I sometimes feel that Alfred E. Neuman is in charge in Washington"
Republican insult: "Clinton better watch out if he comes down here. He'd better have a bodyguard."
Which remark should cause outrage?
Democratic insult: "I sometimes feel that Alfred E. Neuman is in charge in Washington"
Republican insult: "Clinton better watch out if he comes down here. He'd better have a bodyguard."
Which remark should cause outrage?
Sunday, July 10, 2005
An Open Letter to Bud Selig
Mr. Bud Selig
Commissioner
Major League Baseball
Dear Mr. Selig:
As the All-Star Game, Major League Baseball's mid-summer classic, approaches again, I have been thinking about your decision to award home field advantage in the World Series to the winning league. On that topic, I have one quick question I would like for you to address:
Commissioner
Major League Baseball
Dear Mr. Selig:
As the All-Star Game, Major League Baseball's mid-summer classic, approaches again, I have been thinking about your decision to award home field advantage in the World Series to the winning league. On that topic, I have one quick question I would like for you to address:
ARE YOU RETARDED????
How do I think your decision is absurd? Let me count the ways:
1. THIS is am EXHIBITION. You know--GAMES THAT DON'T COUNT!
2. Rosters are in large part selected by fans. Yup, there's a sure guarantee of getting the best lineups. Add in that every team has to be represented and "all-star" becomes a rather loose concept.
3. The availability of the top pitchers may be compromised because of their work the week before the game, and top players always find convenient "injuries."
4. Think a Devil Ray outfielder is going to run into the wall to make a game-saving catch just so there can be an extra game in the Bronx or in Anaheim?
5. The pressure to win could place managers in a difficult position with regard to using players from division rivals by squeezing an extra inning or two out of a pitcher.
The All-Star game is fine for what it is, an exhibition. Bud, here's a tip. How about awarding home field advantage in the World Series to, oh, I don't know...THE TEAM THAT WON THE MOST GAMES???????????????????
How do I think your decision is absurd? Let me count the ways:
1. THIS is am EXHIBITION. You know--GAMES THAT DON'T COUNT!
2. Rosters are in large part selected by fans. Yup, there's a sure guarantee of getting the best lineups. Add in that every team has to be represented and "all-star" becomes a rather loose concept.
3. The availability of the top pitchers may be compromised because of their work the week before the game, and top players always find convenient "injuries."
4. Think a Devil Ray outfielder is going to run into the wall to make a game-saving catch just so there can be an extra game in the Bronx or in Anaheim?
5. The pressure to win could place managers in a difficult position with regard to using players from division rivals by squeezing an extra inning or two out of a pitcher.
The All-Star game is fine for what it is, an exhibition. Bud, here's a tip. How about awarding home field advantage in the World Series to, oh, I don't know...THE TEAM THAT WON THE MOST GAMES???????????????????
Saturday, July 09, 2005
Call out the National Guard!
So, do you think folks in the gulf coast might like a few guardsmen around to deal with what could be a nasty early-season hurricane?
"Where have all the guardsmen gone, long time passing...
Where have all the guardsmen gone, long time ago
Where have the guardsmen gone?
To Iraq for nothing at all,
When will they ever learn...
When will they ever learn..."
"Where have all the guardsmen gone, long time passing...
Where have all the guardsmen gone, long time ago
Where have the guardsmen gone?
To Iraq for nothing at all,
When will they ever learn...
When will they ever learn..."
Friday, July 08, 2005
One, two, three strikes you're out.....
The talking heads have been abuzz over the London bombings, and of course, the Wall Street journal editorial page opined that they hate us for who we are, not what we do. Lord am I glad that they keep those crackpots away from the business side, otherwise the WSJ would be the Weekly World News!
I see this tragedy and the continuing disaster in Iraq as an unfortunate outgrowth of a unique trifecta of failure in the administration's plan for the so-called "war on terror." With a respectful nod to Sun Tzu and his masterwork from a world ago, The Art of War, the administration failed to: 1) know ourselves 2) know the enemy and 3) know the situation.
As Sun-Tzu reminds us from 2500 years ago, "when you engage in actual fighting, if victory is long in coming, then men's weapons will grow dull and their ardor will be damped. If you lay siege to a town, you will exhaust your strength.....if the campaign is protracted, the resources of the State will not be equal to the strain. ...when your weapons are dulled, your ardor damped, your strength exhausted and your treasure spent, other chieftains will spring up to take advantage of your extremity, then no man, however wise, will be able to avert the consequences that must ensue."
1) The decisionmakers did not know ourselves, including the tactical and strategic strengths and weaknesses of our military and the willingness of the people to embrace this conflict. They miscalculated the forces necessary, the supplies and equipment needed, the logistical situation on the ground and the makeup of an all-volunteer army. Included within the last is the failure to properly calculate:
a) the numbers needed;
b) the impact on the war on future recruitment;
c) the misuse of the National guard and the Reserve. These are not professionally-trained front-line troops, they are veterinary technicians and insurance salesmen who want to serve and make some pocket money. The guard and reserve as we knew it has been abused--welcome to hurricane season;
d) the psychological, sociological and economic impact on those deployed and their families and
e) the cost of aftercare for those who have suffered grievous physical and mental harm.
The administration also never was truthful with the American people on the reasons for this war, and equated opposition to the war with a lack of patriotism. As Teddy Roosevelt, a great Republican president stated, "to announce that there must be no criticism of the president, or that we are to stand by the president, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public."
2) They did not understand the enemy. First, can we stop with the "War on Terror?" Terror, as thousands have said, is a tactic. You cannot make war on a tactic. Terror is a tactic that has been used for thousands of years, in various incarnations, from barbarian tribes on the fringe of Rome to Civil War Raiders to the mujahadeen in Afghanistan, and it has been used for so long because it is an effective way for the outmanned and outgunned to strike at the heart and mind of an enemy that appears superior on paper.
The "War on Terror" also inappropriately lumps together disparate entities that have no inherent connection other than their choice of violence du jour. Rebels in Chechnya, paramilitary forces in the Philippines, Basque separatists and al Qaida may use the same toolbox but they are building vastly different projects.
As I mentioned above, according to the Wall Street Journal editorial board, they hate us for who we are. They hate us because we drive SUVs, because a scantily-clad Paris Hilton soaps up a car in a burger ad, because we listen to irreverent music, because our kids wear suggestive clothes and because most of us read some different testaments of Mid-East religions.
Right.
OK, there may be some unstable jihadists out there who think offing a few infidels caps a perfect day out with the family, but for the most part, terror is a TACTIC used to accomplish an OBJECTIVE. A key part of fighting that war is understanding that objective. It isn't getting Paris Hilton off TV (although that is a laudable goal) or covering up haltertops or ending conspicuous consumption or having Limbaugh go to a station break so the imam can call the faithful to prayer over the EIB Network.
Their objectives are to stop various U.S. policies that have an impact on their lives or belief sets, from our stance on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict to bases in their holy lands to the Iraqi invasion and occupation. Understanding does not mean condoning their actions or necessarily yielding, but fighting an enemy without understanding their objectives is nothing but swinging at curveballs in the dirt.
3. They didn't understand the situation. From not dealing with the complex interplay of Shi'a and Sunnis, to creating a power vacuum with no alternative to fill it, from a seemingly permanent occupation of a Muslim land to losing control of the roads is do not pass go, do not collect $200 (unless you're Halliburton), head straight for hell!
Strike Three.
Peace.
I see this tragedy and the continuing disaster in Iraq as an unfortunate outgrowth of a unique trifecta of failure in the administration's plan for the so-called "war on terror." With a respectful nod to Sun Tzu and his masterwork from a world ago, The Art of War, the administration failed to: 1) know ourselves 2) know the enemy and 3) know the situation.
As Sun-Tzu reminds us from 2500 years ago, "when you engage in actual fighting, if victory is long in coming, then men's weapons will grow dull and their ardor will be damped. If you lay siege to a town, you will exhaust your strength.....if the campaign is protracted, the resources of the State will not be equal to the strain. ...when your weapons are dulled, your ardor damped, your strength exhausted and your treasure spent, other chieftains will spring up to take advantage of your extremity, then no man, however wise, will be able to avert the consequences that must ensue."
1) The decisionmakers did not know ourselves, including the tactical and strategic strengths and weaknesses of our military and the willingness of the people to embrace this conflict. They miscalculated the forces necessary, the supplies and equipment needed, the logistical situation on the ground and the makeup of an all-volunteer army. Included within the last is the failure to properly calculate:
a) the numbers needed;
b) the impact on the war on future recruitment;
c) the misuse of the National guard and the Reserve. These are not professionally-trained front-line troops, they are veterinary technicians and insurance salesmen who want to serve and make some pocket money. The guard and reserve as we knew it has been abused--welcome to hurricane season;
d) the psychological, sociological and economic impact on those deployed and their families and
e) the cost of aftercare for those who have suffered grievous physical and mental harm.
The administration also never was truthful with the American people on the reasons for this war, and equated opposition to the war with a lack of patriotism. As Teddy Roosevelt, a great Republican president stated, "to announce that there must be no criticism of the president, or that we are to stand by the president, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public."
2) They did not understand the enemy. First, can we stop with the "War on Terror?" Terror, as thousands have said, is a tactic. You cannot make war on a tactic. Terror is a tactic that has been used for thousands of years, in various incarnations, from barbarian tribes on the fringe of Rome to Civil War Raiders to the mujahadeen in Afghanistan, and it has been used for so long because it is an effective way for the outmanned and outgunned to strike at the heart and mind of an enemy that appears superior on paper.
The "War on Terror" also inappropriately lumps together disparate entities that have no inherent connection other than their choice of violence du jour. Rebels in Chechnya, paramilitary forces in the Philippines, Basque separatists and al Qaida may use the same toolbox but they are building vastly different projects.
As I mentioned above, according to the Wall Street Journal editorial board, they hate us for who we are. They hate us because we drive SUVs, because a scantily-clad Paris Hilton soaps up a car in a burger ad, because we listen to irreverent music, because our kids wear suggestive clothes and because most of us read some different testaments of Mid-East religions.
Right.
OK, there may be some unstable jihadists out there who think offing a few infidels caps a perfect day out with the family, but for the most part, terror is a TACTIC used to accomplish an OBJECTIVE. A key part of fighting that war is understanding that objective. It isn't getting Paris Hilton off TV (although that is a laudable goal) or covering up haltertops or ending conspicuous consumption or having Limbaugh go to a station break so the imam can call the faithful to prayer over the EIB Network.
Their objectives are to stop various U.S. policies that have an impact on their lives or belief sets, from our stance on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict to bases in their holy lands to the Iraqi invasion and occupation. Understanding does not mean condoning their actions or necessarily yielding, but fighting an enemy without understanding their objectives is nothing but swinging at curveballs in the dirt.
3. They didn't understand the situation. From not dealing with the complex interplay of Shi'a and Sunnis, to creating a power vacuum with no alternative to fill it, from a seemingly permanent occupation of a Muslim land to losing control of the roads is do not pass go, do not collect $200 (unless you're Halliburton), head straight for hell!
Strike Three.
Peace.
A great food site
epicurious.com is one of my favorite cooking sites (link to the right). If you go to the recipe search page and put in "Rasmussen" you will find a great Greek chicken, a Mexican-style snapper and a linguini with clam sauce from Bon Appetit magazine by yours truly.
A Wie-bit too whiny....
I am growing very weary of the players and others whining about Michelle Wie playing in men's events on the links. As Deep Throat said so many years ago---follow the money. The PGA tour makes plenty off TV, etc., but local tournament committees live on tickets and concessions. The gate at Pebble Beach is one thing, the take in the Quad Cities is another. If the John Deere Classic, already screwed by being right before the quest for the Claret Jug across the pond. needs a boost at the gate, I'm all for it. With Hunter Mahan and J.L. Lewis at the top of the leader board, they need all the spark they can get!
A must-read Schmidlap rant
You will find the link to my friend John's blog, Schmidlap's Kurtoses, over to the right. He has a hilarious and much-deserved skewering of the Chicago Tribune on board this week:
I bought the Sunday Chicago Tribune last weekend, the first time I've purchased that fishwrap since I cancelled my subscription after their endorsement of the functionally retarded/pathological liar/war criminal coke fiend for Preznit. But as shameful as that editorial decision was (and don't worry, I won't belabor it (much) further at this point), that was only the straw that broke my back. I was throwing out pounds of their product every week, some still in the plastic bags they were delivered in, unread.............
One point deserves some attention here, John's rant on bad comics in the paper. The Tribune runs a comic strip called "Prickly City." Bad neocon "humor"--bad, bad, bad. I don't care about your ideology, Scott Stantis. All I care about is whether or not you are funny, and your humor rating is somewhere between boils and the mumps. Makes it tough to be a good "comic," huh?
I bought the Sunday Chicago Tribune last weekend, the first time I've purchased that fishwrap since I cancelled my subscription after their endorsement of the functionally retarded/pathological liar/war criminal coke fiend for Preznit. But as shameful as that editorial decision was (and don't worry, I won't belabor it (much) further at this point), that was only the straw that broke my back. I was throwing out pounds of their product every week, some still in the plastic bags they were delivered in, unread.............
One point deserves some attention here, John's rant on bad comics in the paper. The Tribune runs a comic strip called "Prickly City." Bad neocon "humor"--bad, bad, bad. I don't care about your ideology, Scott Stantis. All I care about is whether or not you are funny, and your humor rating is somewhere between boils and the mumps. Makes it tough to be a good "comic," huh?
And the Hippy Goes To....
The Hippy is The Thinker's award for Best Performance by a Hypocrite. Now of course, President Chimpy has long since clinched the Lifetime Achievement Award Hippy, as he celebrates his "culture of life" while giggling through executions and a needless war. However, we are in search of new and qualified candidates. Please suggest worthy nominees!
This week:
CIA Chief Porter Goss
Oh, we know where Osama is, but we can't get him because we respect national sovereignty. "I just flew in from Iraq and boy are my arms tired! Good night, drive safely, tip your servers, I'll be here at the Comedy Shack all week!"
We respect sovereign nations? Of course we do, except for those that we invade, imprison their leader and establish a military occupation!
Jerry Springer
I actually like Jerry's radio show, but he had a whopper this week. While giving Karl Rove a much-deserved verbal beatdown, he said that he didn't like attacking or hurting people. Jerry...Jerry...Jerry...
Hello, McFly??!!!! Your career over the last generation was nothing but inciting red state-based genetic experiments gone horribly awry into a chair-throwing rage, and you don't like hurting people? Then why have you for years confronted these poor freaks with the fact that their wives are engaged in repeated romantic dalliances with various other species?????????????
This week:
CIA Chief Porter Goss
Oh, we know where Osama is, but we can't get him because we respect national sovereignty. "I just flew in from Iraq and boy are my arms tired! Good night, drive safely, tip your servers, I'll be here at the Comedy Shack all week!"
We respect sovereign nations? Of course we do, except for those that we invade, imprison their leader and establish a military occupation!
Jerry Springer
I actually like Jerry's radio show, but he had a whopper this week. While giving Karl Rove a much-deserved verbal beatdown, he said that he didn't like attacking or hurting people. Jerry...Jerry...Jerry...
Hello, McFly??!!!! Your career over the last generation was nothing but inciting red state-based genetic experiments gone horribly awry into a chair-throwing rage, and you don't like hurting people? Then why have you for years confronted these poor freaks with the fact that their wives are engaged in repeated romantic dalliances with various other species?????????????
Thursday, July 07, 2005
Raise your hand....
Raise your hand if the thought that the timing of the horrific London bombings was just a little too convenient. Every Oliver Stone wannabe sees this as a very effective way of pushing Karl Rove, the Supreme Court and the CIC (continuing Iraqi clusterfuck) off the front pages.
What a sad comment on this presidency that such a thought could even flicker, but this entire presidency has served to make such a ghastly possibility just that--a possibility.
Peace.
What a sad comment on this presidency that such a thought could even flicker, but this entire presidency has served to make such a ghastly possibility just that--a possibility.
Peace.
We're fighting them there...
Our fearless leader loves to say that we're fighting "terrorists" there so we don't have to fight them here. Well, as London tragically learned today--they are fighting us here BECAUSE we are fighting them there, and it is only going to get worse.
Wednesday, July 06, 2005
The Miller's Tale
Can we PLEASE let go of any sense that Judith Miller is any kind of hero or martyr for a free press? For one thing, her drumming up support for the Iraq war in the New York Times (the supposedly "LIBERAL" New York Times, that led the headlong rush into war and was the primary water carrier on Whitewater) would have done Keith Moon and John Bonham proud. She is not protecting a SOURCE--she is protecting a CRIMINAL!
The Designated Hitter
I don't like the designated hitter rule in Major League Baseball much , but--
IT IS ABSURD to have two "divisions" of supposedly the same entity playing by different rules! Should the NBA western conference have a 4-pt shot from 30 feet or allow 7 fouls, should the AFC have a 3-point conversion from the 10-yard line or a 4-pointt field goal from 50+? Of course not. Should some NHL teams.... (oh, never mind).
AL and NL teams are constructed differently, and of course managed differently, as pitching and bench needs are different from DH to no DH. This isn't like building a team to fit the quirks of a stadium or particular philosophies. This is a PROFOUND difference in basic rules. IT ISN"T THE SAME GAME. Get rid of it, one way or the other.
And in terms of other minor annoyances, such as illegal Mid-East wars, corporate corruption, environmental disaster, etc. to deal with, but also, by immediate executive order, I would ban the use of ANY and ALL singular team names!
No more Heat, Hustle, Fury, Liberty, Fire, Force, Crush, Rush, Magic, Avalanche, Swarm, Jazz, Blast, etc. etc.
Peace.
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